For parents

It is common for people to feel lonely when expecting a baby or parenting an infant. One survey found that up to 80% of parents asked felt alone some of the time.

• Find support

What is loneliness?

Loneliness is a personal feeling people have when:

• their need for social contact and relationships is not being met.
• they feel different from other people or like they don’t belong.

Parents can still feel lonely even if they are with their baby and surrounded by others, including supportive family and friends.

There are lots of reasons parents may feel lonely including:

• Feeling alone or lost with the challenge of pregnancy or parenting
• Spending a lot of time alone with the baby/child
• Finding it hard/impossible to do activities they used to do
• Going to work and not spending time with their family
• Having little or no time for themselves
• Feeling unsupported
• Relationships and friendships changing since baby
• Missing their former life (e.g. social activities & work)
• Comparing themselves negatively to others
• Feeling trapped, or finding it hard to leave the house
• Feeling like a failure
• Feeling guilty for finding pregnancy or parenting hard, or for not enjoying pregnancy or parenting
• Feeling guilty if they do anything for themselves

When parents feel lonely, they might not tell anyone, find help, or make changes to help themselves:

They might feel:

• Unsure of what to say, who to tell or who could help
• Unsure of the services and support available locally, or how to find about them
• Unsure of which service is the right one or how to access them
• Worried about appearing ungrateful for the support they do have
• Upset because they feel like they are the only one finding it hard
• Like they should just ‘get on with it’ because they’ve been told ‘its normal’ to feel lonely
• Too overwhelmed or exhausted to do anything about their situation
• Like there is no point in trying to change anything because their life is hard enough

Are some people more at risk of loneliness than others?

Anyone can feel lonely when pregnant or caring for an infant. Our research group made a list of all the things that people felt contributed to their loneliness. There will be some missing.

We are currently working on a booklet for parents to support them with loneliness which should be published in April 2026. Please also see:

• Our animated video about parents experiences of loneliness